Tuesday, Feb. 14, 2006

im in the library now...its quite a relieve after running about the whole place. aircon on sweat. aircon on dusty, slicky hair. sweat on aircon. whew. today just didnt feel like a normal day at school. the whole thing -the things that happened, the people, the cookies gifts roses notes- was quite surreal. its like one of those dreams where the events happen around u, and u have no control over what to say or do. the things u say or do, are said because u know its just the right thing to say, so tt the storyline of your dream can continue. its strange. it is the weirdest of weirdest times to be feeling like that. i felt like i needed some time alone, some time to breathe, if not id suffocate from the funniness of it all.

so here i am.
blogging after a long time feels funny. i think im blogging funny already.

enough of that. the place at the library. this place. what did i want to say? oh the people here. i dont know any of them. but yet there seems to be this peacefulness about them. almost like heaven. erm. almost like they're all dead. but thats such a morbid thought. such a weird thing to say!

okay. time to snap snap snap out of this. the way things are, its gg to get really depressing. if u think about weird sad stuff, and think "okay im sad" then u'll be really sad. like they say its all in the mind.

its easy to think happy thoughts. happiness is something that when u share it with others, it multiplies and multiplies and multiplies. like an exponential function, i imagine. so f(x)>0, f'(x)>0, and f"(x)>0. let the initial x be the number of people u share yr happiness with. so since f'(x), the more people u share it with, the happier u get. and its even better since f"(x)!! so in awhile u and everynoe else ard will be infinitely happy. so uve got excess happiness to spare. want some?? oh no. its just so simplistic to put something as abstract as emotions in simple mathematical terms. how do u calculate that? everything becomes so 2D, there are too many sides to things, there's gg to be a z-axis, plus an a,b,c,d,e,f-axis if needed! u cant just calculate like that! jiarui you're maddd!!
okokok
OKAY
i better stop this now.
for once i shall title this entry.
maybe "if i were mentally unsound for a day...". yes it'll be good.

jotted in plain black and white at 1:28 p.m.
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