sch's started, everything's gg all well. ive gotten whatever ive prayed for, everything i ever wanted. u know, how sometimes u can be contented but think "if only i had this this this.."? so ur Quite happy, not quite perfectly happy yet. right now, i no longer have any this-this-this criterias to fulfil. THIS is it. this is how it feels like to be happy. and lately ive been feeling tt very often. actually nothing BIG happened, sorry to disappoint. its just the way things are. i like the feeling of having Settled down properly. i am content, i feel so blessed. i dont know really which - if im blessed thats why i feel contented, or if im contented easily thats why im blessed. but either way, it isnt a bad thing!
i can safely say that at this point of time, life is wonderful. even in my half-drugged state of mind, at close to 5am in the morning.
or maybe im saying this, precisely cos its 5am in the morning and im in a dying-to-sleep-but-cant-sleep state cos i drank lotsa caffein today to keep myself awake tru the very very long day.
i was trying my darndest to stay awake at starbucks this afternoon, just before choir 12 hr ago. and now 12 hrs on, im DYING here to fall asleep on my bed. but i cant.
ive been having RANDOM stupid happy thoughts about really retarded things that had happened in the past, that make me wanna smile and cry and laugh and jump about all at the same time. and no im not in love. neither am i crazy (even tho this isnt really for me to say! haha).
i dont know why, but i thought of sam and how much fun we used to have back then just last year in sch. we'll listen to my old black nano and sing the dumbest song on blk A's roof.
and how phoebe would always suddenly turn around in class and ask smth like 'What do u wanna eat later?' 3 whole lessons before recess (i.e. 1st lesson of the day). and then mel will say smth like "breakfast set!" or "yongtoufu!" very enthusiastically, and then instantly, everything will sound very yummy, and we'll take the next 3 lessons deciding which to eat. ok la, abit of an exaggeration hahaha.
and there's the Gap period with Ruizhen and Mel and tasha. and how we'll SQUEEZE our bag in our little spaceship locker, and cashiering and being stressed, and talking about customers, types of Gap denim cut, all the WEirdest things we wldnt Dream of talking about now cos they're so irrelevant (like refilling Gap paperbags, and types of scotchtape we like to use to tape the paper bags. etc)
oh no now i am so sleeepy i'll stop here first even tho its so abrupt. goodnight!