ahhh i think i shd just THROW the statcounter thing away. it freaks me out. its scary knowing that people read. i mean, i do know that its a blog, and that people read, but when i think 'people' i imagine my direct friends (in friendster term it's called 1st degree friends), so thats okay. i dont really mind total strangers reading either. the one that's eeky is the friend's-friend-type(2nd degree, 3rd degree, acquaintances etc). cos they see u, but they dont know u, and so they assume u are whatever they read abt u.

u dont actually consciously think about. people always say why blog? i know why i blog. its hard to say. its a sorta companionship -its like talking to a friend, cos u know yr friends will come to this place and read the stuff. but u dont wanna call them or talk to them on msn because that is what u ALWAYS do with them ALREADY anyway. and plus u dont have to bug them when they aint free. they can come when they're bored and have all the time in the world, so much time that they'll even put up with reading idiotic stuff. so its their choice if they wanna come here. and even if the topic's getting damn boring, they can always just close the browser window. haha. in short it's just another variation of communication.

but then if u have a statcounter or smth, u realise the readers probably arent yr friends. for instance, there's one reader who came from google. tt person googled 'sam rjc 1So6E'..so someone's actually spying on sam! haha, sam u have either an enemy, fan, or at least, smone noticed u!! and tt person's been returning for the past few weeks.

oh sigh sometimes i wonder why i care. its nt as if im a bad person. people dont hate others for blogging stupid stuff anw, so jiarui have more confidence!!

this is really dumb i shd just go do my tutorials